Loss of control

Loss of control is a state in which a person experiences limited influence over their own emotions, impulses, behavior or situation.

Definition

Loss of control may be a subjective feeling or a real decrease in the ability to regulate. It may appear with severe stress, panic, anger, overload, addiction, fatigue or illness. It doesn't always mean a complete lack of agency - often the first step is to regain a small element of influence.

Key ideas

  1. Decrease in regulation
  2. Overload
  3. Reclaiming low impact

Practice and life

In a moment of chaos, choose one controllable thing: breathing, body position, moving away from the stimulus, contacting the person, writing down the next step.

Common misconceptions

It is a mistake to shame yourself for losing control. It is also a mistake to ignore recurring episodes that may require specialist help. > Loss of control may be a signal that the system has been operating without adjustment for too long. > — Guru Element

Questions for self-reflection

  • What have I really lost control over?
  • What's the smallest item I can recover?
  • Is this a one-off or a pattern?

Sources