The language of emotions
Emotional language is the ability to name emotional states precisely enough to better understand and communicate them.
Definition
The more precisely a person can name an emotion, the easier it is to distinguish anger from fear, sadness from fatigue, or tension from shame. The language of emotions is not used to dramatize but to organize experience. It also helps to communicate without accusations, because instead of attacking the other person, you can describe your own condition.
Key ideas
- Naming precision
- Emotion regulation
- Communication without accusations
Practice and life
Instead of writing down "I feel bad", choose three more precise words: e.g. disappointed, tense, lonely, ashamed, overload.
Common misconceptions
It is a mistake to use judgments as emotions, e.g. "I feel you are disrespecting me." A common mistake is to stop at the general "good/bad".
> Today's emotions say more about you than all the words you have said since the beginning of your life.
> — Guru Element
Questions for self-reflection
- What emotion am I really feeling?
- Does this word describe a state or a judgment?
- What does this emotion tell me about my need?